Chapter Five: Can't.Stop.Thinking.About.You (about 3 days later)
"I'm now officially sick of bungee cords..." AJ sighed as he flopped on the couch. The others dropped their bags on the ground and followed his lead.
"I just hate planes," Nick grumbled as he sat down.
"Don't worry, we're back...home sweet home," Julie laughed as the dogs ran over to greet us.
"I hope we didn't trash the hotel rooms too much..." Cathy giggled as Kezia tried to get her attention. Howie shrugged his shoulders.
"Well, ours was clean," Jenny beamed, and linked arms with me. I laughed as Roky and Darwin attacked us.
"When do we finally get to see this video, huh?" Chin poked AJ. He looked over at her.
"OW! That tattoo, be careful!" he whined.
"I still can't believe you got a freaking RED DRAGON on your shoulder..." Jenny muttered.
"Well believe it, cuz it's there for life," AJ laughed.
"You didn't answer me!" Chin complained. "When do we get to see 'Larger Than Life'?"
"Um...September..."
"SEPTEMBER!?" we all screamed.
"Whoa, girls, calm down...it's not THAT far away!" Howie laughed.
"NO, we will not calm down. You guys still won't explain the freaking video to us and we have to wait about a month to see it!?" Cathy exclaimed.
"It's way less than a month, I think you guys can wait," Nick replied.
"What if we don't want to?" Julie asked.
"You'll just have to," he laughed.
"Dude, what time is it...?" I yawned, changing the subject.
"Um...almost 10 PM..." Kevin replied.
"I opt to sleep. Anyone with me?" I got up and stretched. AJ arched an eyebrow.
"You mean sleep WITH you? I think I know who'd be up for that..."
"AJ!" Chin and I screamed as she, being the nearest to him, swatted him with a pillow from one of the couches. Jenny laughed as she saw Kevin turn a bit red.
"AH! One comment and I get killed...!" he threw his hands up in the air.
"Well, what do you expect with a mind like that?" Chin scrunched up her nose at him.
"ANYWAY...as I was saying...I'm going to go to sleep...goodnight to you all...see you in the morning," I stated, and turned to walk up the stairs.
"Girl, you get sleepy too easily!" Chin laughed.
"Hey, who was the one that always pulled the all-nighters every single time at our sleepovers in high school...HUH?" I replied defensively, before going up the stairs.
"I don't wanna go up. The room's a mess," Chin commented.
"Yeah, cuz your crap is all over the floor!" Cathy accused.
"Hey, it's Hannah's crap, not mine!"
"If she were here, she'd be defending herself...Fine then, c'mon...I'll help with whoever's crap it is...I wanna sleep," Cathy got up to head towards their room. Cathy turned to look at Chin, and gave a sigh, knowing Chin wasn't going to move. "Fine, Chin, be that way. I'm still gonna clean up that room of yours. Don't get mad if you can't find your stuff in the morning...C'mon, Muscle Man," she called Howie. He sighed and followed to help.
"Lazy, are we?" AJ laughed. Chin, still on the couch, made a face at him.
"Hey, don't you have to call Cindy?" Nick whispered to Brian. Jenny could hear them, but gave no indication that she had.
"Yeah, but it's too late now, Frack. I'll just call her in the morning," Brian nodded.
"You know you're lucky, man," Nick elbowed him. Brian grinned.
"You are too, Frack," he replied, as Nick stole a glance at Julie. Brian smiled lightly of the memory of when we first knew the Boys. All that confusion. And Julie. How he had liked Julie and scared the crap out of her by kissing her in Space Mountain. But Julie had liked Nick, and seemingly made a good choice, because the couple now fit together like two puzzle pieces. It had been fun getting to know everyone. And now he was getting to know Cindy...
"I'm gonna go before Sarah falls asleep...she hates being woken up," Jenny sighed and got up. She gave a weak smile, waved goodnight, and headed upstairs to our room.
Julie noticed that Jenny hadn't hugged Brian goodnight - a somewhat ritual that she thought had formed between the two. But Brian hadn't noticed...he just waved goodnight like everyone else, and continued to talk to Nick about Cindy.~*~*~*~
Jenny thought I was asleep when she entered our room. I heard her rummaging around and getting ready for bed. She only had the light in the bathroom on, hoping she wouldn't wake me up. We could hear some noise downstairs...from Chin, Julie, AJ, and Nick, who were still up. Jenny turned off the light, emerged from the bathroom, changed in her nightclothes, and shuffled through some things for awhile. I kept my eyes closed. I felt her presence beside me - probably checking to see if I was asleep. She returned to her bed area and I heard her fiddle with our boom box in the moonlight that filtered through the window. She plopped a CD in, turned it on, and put the volume on low. Before she hit play, we heard a voice.
"Hey, missy..." Brian popped his head in. I opened my eyes slightly. He was cast against the light in the hallway. Jenny turned around. I kept up my sleeping act.
"Hey, Bri..."
"Don't worry, I'm not gonna keep you up," he said softly as he came into the room. He made sure to close the door to prevent the light from shining on my face. "Just wanted my goodnight hug. Can't go to sleep without it," he confessed.
"What are you going to do on tour, then?" she lightly smiled...he had remembered.
"Hmmm, good question. Before, we didn't have this ritual...but now...hmm...Maybe I'll have to bug one of the guys...but then they'll think I'm odd..." he grinned and walked towards her. Jenny laughed at his goofy grin. She sighed as he enveloped her in his arms. "Hmmm, you must be tired." Brian misunderstood her sigh for sleepiness. He pulled out of the hug but left a hand on each of her shoulders and looked into her eyes. "Get some rest, k?" he said and rubbed his hands up and down her arms warmly. She attempted to smile. "See you in the morning." He kissed her on her forehead and headed out of the room.
Jenny gave a sigh slumped on her bed as soon as he was gone. "What is wrong with me?" she whispered to herself. "I can't feel this...I won't." She shook her head to try and clear her thoughts. His touch had been so warm...and friendly. He was a good friend. She didn't want to lose that. She had to get rid of her feelings. He'd be leaving soon for the U.S. Tour...maybe it was just the closeness that was getting to her. She turned off the lights, got into bed, and resumed her intended actions with the stereo. She hit play and closed her eyes.
"There are people that say what you wanna hear...even on a rainy day, they tell you the sky is clear...when you really really love someone am I right when I say that you want them near?...and if you care, you even tell them things that they wanna hear..." Brian's voice sang softly through the stereo speakers. Jenny turned it down a bit, so it was almost inaudible."Man, what time is it?" Nick stretched.
"Late..." Julie yawned.
"It's only 11:45!" Chin and AJ whined.
"Yeah, and the rest of the house is asleep!" Julie replied.
"C'mon, Jules, let's leave 'em to pull an all-nighter if they want..." Nick suggested, taking her hand.
"Goodnight, you guys," Julie said.
"And you two would be going where...?" AJ snickered.
"Chin, hit him for me, k? I'm too tired to think," Julie smiled sleepily as she and Nick left the room.
"Aw, don't be like Jen!" AJ ducked as a pillow flew past his head.
"Jen doesn't use pillows," Chin giggled. AJ ran and tackled her on the couch. "Ahh!...Alex!...Need....AIR!" she squirmed as he tickled her.
"Naw, I like a red-faced Chin," he smiled.
"AJ!!!"
"Arrite, arrite, you may breathe," he grinned, and sat up. Chin dramatically took a few deep breaths and sat up to face him.
"You are just a punk." She pressed an accusing finger on his chest. Her face came dangerously close to his...an inch or two more and he could kiss her.
"So?" He tried to smile and dismiss his thoughts.
"Um..." She leaned back to sit down.
"Good comeback," he laughed, relieved that the temptation was gone, that her face was away from his.
"Don't I know it?" she smiled and got up to turn off the lights.
"We going to sleep or something?" AJ asked.
"I dunno. Our friends have gone to bed - stop snickering - so I guess sleep would be fine," she replied, and plopped back down on the couch beside him.
"K." He got up.
"No, Alex." She grabbed his hand. "Stay."
"But I thought we were going to sleep." AJ looked down at her through the darkness.
"But I'm too lazy to go up the stairs...can't we just stay here?"
"Oh...ok..." AJ slightly hesitated, but sat back down. Chin got up again, ran out of the room, and returned with a blanket.
"I thought you were to lazy to get up," AJ commented.
"Can't have mister Bone freezing," she grinned.
I don't need a blanket to keep me warm, Chin...I need you...
He shook his head. He wasn't supposed to think that.
"Déja-vu," Chin quietly said as she snuggled up against him.
"Huh?"
"Remember the second night you guys came to visit this time?" she yawned.
"Oh...yeah..." He remembered her coming back late at night from seeing Jack... and he remembered the conversation. He remembered his resolution from that night. I don't want to scare you, Chin...
"I could get used to this," she quietly laughed. "I get to sleep on the real AJ."
"Yes. Funny," he laughed. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "Just get some sleep..."
"Me? You should be the one getting sleep. That shoot must have been tiring."
"Naw, I'm used to it."
"Well, g'nite, Alex." Chin wrapped her arms around his waist and gave him a little squeeze. "Remind me that I've got to get some meat on you," she joked, looking up to tell him, before resting her head on his chest again and curling up against him.
"Will do," he smiled. He was fighting with himself as Chin fell asleep. Soon, all he could hear was the ticking of the clock, normal creaks of the house, and Chin as her breathing became deep and steady. "Sweet dreams," he whispered, and kissed her forehead.(outside on the balcony)
What is wrong with me? Jenny asked herself for the second time that night.
She had woken up from her re-occurring dream.
She couldn't get back to sleep and thought some fresh air would help her racing mind.
She couldn't figure it out. Was it jealousy? Was she being selfishly possessive?
I mean, I can't even let Brian be friends or whatever with Cindy without getting all worked up. Well, not worked up, but just...upset. Why can't I be happy that Bri has met someone? I DID promise Sarah back in the hotel that I would try to act normal. But the whole breakfast incident had been hard. But Sarah also made a point to pound in my head that Brian had given his all to get me to feel better. What kind of a friend am I, to not trust his judgement and give him some leeway in life?
Sighing, she hugged her knees closer to her chest, resting one cheek on her arm. Feeling overwhelmed, she closed her eyes, noticing the clean smell of her PJ's. A wave of confusion continued to ebb at the shores of her heartstrings.
If he IS so wrapped up in Cindy, why did he remember to come to my room to continue the goodnight-hug routine?
She snuggled her cheek deeper in her arm at the thought of his strong, but warm hug...~*~*~*~
(The next day)"Hey, J, What you doin' up so early, man?" Brian yawned and walked into the kitchen. AJ was sitting at the counter on a stool, hunched over a cup of coffee. He looked up and shrugged.
"I dunno. It's not too early..."
"Oh, no...it's only 6AM," Brian lightly laughed as he walked to the fridge.
"So?"
"That's early for AJ." Brian poured himself a glass of orange juice.
"Oh."
"What's wrong, man?" Brian pulled up a stool beside him and sat down with the glass. AJ shrugged again. "Stop shrugging!"
"What do you want me to do?"
"Hold up your end of this conversation."
"Oh. This is a conversation?"
"Funny...What's bothering you, Age?"
"I...dunno..."
"Yes...you do." Brian pressed. AJ sighed.
"...Remember what I told you that one time on the bus? About Chin?"
"Yeah. I thought you were over that cuz, well, the subject never came up again..."
"I'm far from over it..." AJ whispered.
"What?" Brian didn't hear him.
"Never mind."
"No, tell me."
"Alex, you left me there all alone!" The two Boys looked up to see Chin in the kitchen. "Shame on you," she yawned. "I would hurt you, but I'm too sleepy. Just need some water..." She headed over to the sink and filled a glass.
"Someone's up with the roosters," Brian laughed. Chin smiled.
AJ had yet to say something...she noticed.
"You okay, Alex?" She came over and leaned on the counter across form them, looking at him.
"I haven't gotten that much sleep, that's all..." he trailed off.
"I told you!" She pointed an accusing finger at him. "I told you that you should sleep. But nooo, someone said he'd be fine," she grinned. AJ weakly smiled. Chin yawned again. "Well, I for one still want sleep...I don't want to use the couch right now...I'm going upstairs, k?" Chin waved and left the kitchen. Brian waited till she was out of earshot.
"Man, you know that's not the reason..." Brian patted AJ on the back. He looked up.
"What?"
"You're not okay...and it's not because of losing sleep...
"Well...I told the truth, B...I haven't been able to sleep..." he paused, "...and it's cuz I can't stop thinking about her...""I still can't believe it."
"Believe it."
"After all my hard work!"
"Some things just aren't meant to be, Cathy," Howie sighed. Both were sitting on the hammock.
"But still...you and Joanne-"
"Are friends."
"But-"
"Cathy, just give it up."
"I can't!"
"Why not?"
"Because you're not happy."
"Who says I'm not?"
"How can you be happy without her?"
"Look at me. I am."
"But-"
"Face it, Kat. Joanne and I are over...for good, this time. We both decided we'd be better of as friends, okay?"
"Okay," Cathy sighed, and sunk further into the hammock.
"I don't see why you would think I'd only find happiness with her. What if I'm supposed to be a bachelor all my life?"
"You're not gonna end up like that, D, you know it.""Jenny, you awake?" I whispered, still in my bed.
"Have been, for awhile," she answered from hers.
"Oh."
"Yeah. So what's up?"
"Nothing. Just didn't want to be the only one awake in this house."
"I think some are awake, don't worry."
"You gonna get up?"
"No."
"Why?"
"Cuz...I'm thinking."
"Uh-oh."
"Shut up."
"I'm hurt."
"Well, good for you."
"Jenny, what's wrong?" I asked.
"We've already been through this," she replied.
"Oh."
"Yeah...And he's oblivious."
"He doesn't have to be. You can tell him..."
"No. He's got Cindy."
"He won't for long."
"Why do you say that?"
"I just know."
"No, you don't."
"Fine, don't believe me."
"I won't."
"Jenny, I don't like you like this."
"Like what?"
"This isn't you, Jenny."
"Well, he hasn't noticed that. But don't worry. I'm not going to be like this anymore," she promised more to herself, than to me.
"Is that good or bad?"
"It's...good..."
"You sure?"
"Why shouldn't I be?" She got up from her bed. I sat up.
"I don't know..." I was at a loss for words. She looked at me and shrugged. She gave a sighed and stretched.
"There are people that say what you wanna hear..." she quietly sang as she headed for her closet. "Even on a rainy day, they tell you the sky is clear..." She continued humming the tune as she disappeared amongst her clothes.
"When you really, really love someone...am I right when I say that you want them near?" we heard a voice from outside our bedroom door. "...And if you care, you'd even tell them things that they wanna hear," Brian sang as he stepped in the room. Jenny whipped around, then smiled lightly. "So people like my song, huh?" he grinned.
"Um, yeah...gotta...uh...pee..." Jenny murmured before she left for the bathroom.
"Bad timing?" he asked, and plopped down beside me on the bed.
"Huh?" I looked cut of my gaze at the bathroom door. "Oh...yes...no...I dunno..."
"You girls are acting weird."
"We're allowed to."
"But we're not?"
"Yup."
"No fair."
"Life's not fair," I replied and looked up as Jenny returned.
"Done with the bodily functions?" Brian asked.
"You're disgusting," Jenny made a face.
"I try."
"Mm-hmmm..."
"Let's go eat, I'm starving." I got up and headed or the door.
"K, lead the way...map girl..." Brian snickered. I whirled around.
"Oh, how old is that?" I exclaimed.
"That was SO February, Brian," Jenny laughed.
"That was SO AJ, Brian" I added.
"C'mon, let's just go," he whined. As we headed for the kitchen, we heard a cell phone ringing. "That might be mine, hang on," Brian ran into his room. Jenny and I slowly followed. We stopped before we got to the door. "Hello...Cindy? HI! How are you?...Mm-hmm..."Chapter Six: So.Many.Things.I.Need.To.Say
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