[that night, 8PM
        "Birthday girl...what are you thinking about?" AJ sat down next to Chin. She looked up and smiled at him.
        "You." she said softly and slipped her hand into his.
        "What about me?" AJ grinned as he scooted closer to her. Both were dangling their feet in his pool and watching the sunset.
        "Nothing specific. Just thinking about 'us' overall I guess." Chin stared off into the sky.
        "Doesn't sound good..." AJ noted and he wrapped an arm around Chin, fingers crossed. Chin sighed and leaned back into him, resting her head on his shoulder. "So tell me what it is..." AJ said quietly, kissing her forehead.
        "It's fear..." Chin shrugged out of AJ's hold and stood up.
        "Fear?" AJ gulped. No... She can't be afraid of us... I have to... But she... It won't work if she's... Shit. AJ stood up and followed her. Chin turned to look at AJ. She looked down and stared at her bare feet.
        "It's just... I dunno... I can't stop thinking about...what could happen." Chin looked up. "I don't want to lose you, Alex."
        "You won't..." AJ frowned. How long had she been thinking like this? I thought she was over it. Shows how much I know...
        "But what if another girl... Alex, I'm sorry... I don't want to dwell, but I can't help but think... I mean it's happened before..." Chin rambled on, not noticing AJ cringe at practically every other word.
        "Hon, no one else is going to hurt you. I won't let them," AJ swore as he grabbed her hands and waited for her to look at him.
        "What if one of us..." Chin briefly glanced up at AJ and then pulled away to plop down on a lawn chair. "What if one of us died?"
        "Sarah didn--"
        "What if you or I died?" Chin muttered, interrupting AJ. He stood there stunned.
        "We..." AJ couldn't find the words for which he was looking. He couldn't say they wouldn't die; he didn't know that... What the hell is wrong with fans sometimes? AJ inwardly groaned. He never imagined any fan would make him hate being him. "Chin, come here." AJ reached out his hand for her. She hesitantly took it and he pulled her to her feet.
        "Alex--"
        "Shh..." AJ placed his index finger on her lips. "My turn to do the talking, okay?"
        Chin nodded.
        "Hon, I love you. Nothing is going to stop me from doing so. Nothing. I don't want to lose you, either. But honestly..." AJ pulled Chin closer. "I'd rather die being with you than without you." AJ stared into her eyes and made sure she knew he wasn't lying. Chin threw her arms around AJ and clung to him.
        "No, don't say that," she mumbled. "I can't lose you, Alex. I can't..."
        "So don't give up on us..." AJ whispered into her ear.
        "What if I died, Alex? Would you still feel the same?" Chin pulled away slightly and looked into his eyes.
        "I'd rather have been with you before you--" AJ took a deep breath. "Yes. I'd rather have spent more time with you than not," Chin sighed hopelessly and returned to her lawn chair. AJ took deep breaths. He didn't like the thought of Chin dying... As easy as it was to say he'd be okay as long as he was with her, even if he died... He hadn't put himself in the position, to see what he might've felt, if she was the one who lost her life... In the end it'd be the same... As long as he was with her... AJ sat down on the ground in front of Chin. She was balled up and resting her head on her knees. "Don't cry," AJ said softly, taking one of her hands.
        "I'm not," she sniffled.
        "Liar," AJ smiled and pulled her into his lap. He rubbed her back and kissed her forehead. "Talk to me," he pleaded, wrapping his arms around her warmly.
        "I hate it when you're right," Chin sighed and snuggled deeper into AJ's embrace.
        "I love you, too." AJ tightened his hold. "I know the feeling, Chin. The fear of you dying is big. It's a risk... but isn't it always? Me being a Backstreet Boy makes thing worse. I know. But the fear of not being with you as much as possible is bigger," AJ spoke into Chin's hair. She nodded. After a few minutes of sitting there, Chin finally spoke up.
        "Can we stand up?" She pulled away.
        "Why?" AJ pouted. He liked sitting there and holding her, protecting her from any harm that life would toss their way...
        "Cause sitting like this doesn't give me a chance to hold you," Chin complained. AJ laughed.
        "Good reason." He got up and then leaned over to help Chin up. AJ opened his arms and she stepped into them. "Better?" AJ whispered.
        "Much," Chin smiled and laid her head on his shoulder, her arms tight around his waist.
        "You know what?" AJ chuckled after a few minutes.
        "What?" Chin mumbled.
        "We forgot about your birthday dinner..."
        "So?"
        "So we should get to it before it freezes over," AJ smiled and pulled away slightly.
        "But I like us just standing here..." Chin whined.
        "We've got forever to stand here like this." AJ rested his forehead against hers. "But we only have so long until the dinner I made gets all nasty."
        "Nasty is always good..." Chin grinned and kissed AJ.
        "Stop that. If you keep up I'll never leave your arms," AJ sighed.
        "Stop what?" Chin snickered and kissed AJ again. "I don't know what you're talking about..." She kissed him again.
        "Okay..." AJ grinned. "Maybe a few more minutes..."
        "That's what I thought," Chin smiled and AJ kissed her.

[2 hours later]
        "Miss, would you care to dance?" AJ drawled. Chin looked up and burst out laughing.
        "What?" she giggled.
        "Come on, dance with me..." AJ reached out for her hand.
        "Clean all your dishes already?" Chin waved a finger at AJ.
        "Yes, mother," AJ snorted. Chin giggled and accepted his help and jumped to her feet.
        "It was nice seeing her today," Chin smiled as AJ drew her close.
        "We done talking about my mom yet?" AJ rested his forehead against Chin's as they slowly danced to the radio that was on loud enough to hear outside by the pool.
        "Yes... I thought you loved her," Chin frowned, but closed her eyes, enjoying the moment.
        "I do..." AJ whispered. "It's just us two right now and I--"
        "Alex, stop talking. I am trying to enjoy the moment," Chin giggled.
        "Okay, you're getting it," AJ warned her and opened his mouth. He sang Happy Birthday completely off-key.
        "Oh! Stop!" Chin whined and covered her ears.
        "Okay," AJ grinned and tickled her instead.
        "AJ!" Chin yelped and tried to squirm away from him. Both landed in the pool with a big SPLASH. "You suck!" Chin yelled when she surfaced, sputtering.
        "You're the one who got us in here!" AJ pulled her to him.
        "Well, you're the one who started tickling me!" Chin wrapped her legs around AJ's waist.
        "And you're... beautiful," AJ smiled. Chin giggled.
        "Yeah you would say that... considering I'm wearing a white tank top right now." Chin made a face.
        "I'm looking at your face!" AJ protested.
        "I know," Chin smiled and kissed AJ. "I love you," she sighed happily.
        "I love you, too." AJ pulled Chin closer. "I have something to ask you..."
        "Shoot..." Chin began kissing AJ's neck.
        "Stop that!" AJ chuckled and pulled away.
        "One of these days I'm really going to stop kissing you," Chin threatened.
        "I'm trying to ask a question," AJ pouted and kissed Chin. "I'm sorry."
        "It's okay..." Chin kissed AJ's nose. "Just stop telling me to not kiss you or I will..."
        "Deal. Let's get out okay?"
        "Sure." Chin got down from AJ's embrace and both swam to the edge of the pool. "Everything, okay?" she asked as both of them tried to dry off.
        "As long as you are..." AJ began. Chin looked over and knew what he meant. He was scared she was going to break up with him...
        "I'm scared, Alex... I'm not going to deny that... but I love you... and that fear just wants me to be with you more." Chin took AJ's hands and played with the gold ring she had gotten him.
        "Still got yours?" AJ asked softly, stepping closer. Chin held out her hand for AJ to see, and sure enough, there was a familiar silver band on her finger. AJ kissed her hand. He had listened to his mother. He hadn't planned a thing. He could have waited until tomorrow, even. But he knew that this was the moment. "I've got another ring for you..." AJ smiled and slipped his hand into his pocket and pulled out a small wet box.
        "What...?"
        "Chin..." AJ got down on one knee and took a deep breath. "Will you marry me?"

[same time, back at the house, 3 times zones away]
        Sarah was rummaging through her desk, trying to find AJ's address so she could send the couple random cards just for fun. She knew she had put that information somewhere among the piles of crumpled paper that were filling the drawer. She decided she needed to clean it out, so she pulled out the drawer and turned it upside down over her desk. Most of the paper was trash. Random ideas Julie had run by her for the newspaper, doodles from times she was on the phone and happened to have a pen and paper at her disposal,  old post-it notes with archaic lists and reminder, the emergency numbers Marie had given them last year for the kids and Tick-Tack-Toe games she had played with Zack. She even found some of her old sketches...basically, a lot of stuff.
        She grabbed her waste-paper basket and began to shovel all her trash into it. One crumpled ball of paper missed the basket and fell to her feet. When her desk was clean, and she had found AJ's address, she put the basket back in its place; on her way back to her desk she noticed the paper. She shook her head and knelt down to grab it. She headed back to the basket, ready to throw it away, but first opened it to see what it was. Her breath caught in her throat. It was an old poem...a poem from about three and half years ago.
        She blinked, not fully remembering why she had written it, or not allowing her self to remember. Part of her mind told her that it had been about Kevin...but the rest of her mind wouldn't listen. Just a silly poem, she thought. Don't let it get to you. She heard one of the phone lines in the house ringing and left the paper on her desk to run to the study to answer the phone.
        Kevin emerged from the gameroom, having just finished a boring game of pool with himself. The cats had kept him company, but that was about it. He figured Sarah and Cathy might have been busy, so he thought he'd get the call, but he saw Sarah's figure disappear into the study and inferred that she had gone to answer the phone. Assuming she had just come from her room and that she would return, he headed on over and sat on her bed, hoping to convince her to go do something with him because he was bored out of his mind and didn't want to do his paperwork just yet. Sitting on her bed, his eyes casually scanned the room, stopping to fixate on a crumpled piece of paper on her desk. Thinking she had meant to throw it out, he got up, grabbed it, and headed over the waste-paper-basket. He absent-mindedly opened it to make sure he wasn't throwing away anything important. He stopped dead in his tracks when he noticed words on the paper.
        He came back to his senses when he heard Sarah coming down the hall. He quickly crumpled the piece of paper back up, absentmindedly shoved it in his pocket, and made a mad dive for her bed. She entered the room and noticed him sitting there, looking somewhat perturbed.
        "You okay?" she cracked a smile at his expression.
        "Um yeah...what are you doing now?"
        "Nothing much, why?"
        Kevin ransacked his mind for why he had been in her room in the first place. "You, um, wanna go get dinner for everyone or something?" Sarah raised an eyebrow.
       "Julie said she'd be home late, and Kat's asleep. We don't have any mouths to feed except you and me. I was thinking we had enough leftovers in the fridge from dinner last night. Do you want to make something, maybe?"
        "Uh, no, it's okay. Silly me. I'll, just go have a shower and maybe we can split the leftovers in a little while, okay?" Kevin mumbled before leaving the room promptly.
        "Okay..." Sarah looked after him quizzically and shrugged.
        Kevin briskly walked back to the game room and closed the door. He leaned up against the frame, his mind racing. Had she written that poem? Who was it about? Why did she write it? It was dated from around three and a half years ago...Why did he have so many questions?
        He sighed and shoved his hands into his pocket, becoming alarmed when his hand found the crumpled piece of paper. It dawned on him that when he thought he had placed it back on her desk, he had instead shoved it in his pocket. He silently cursed himself and hoped against hope that she wouldn't notice. He pulled out the paper, and read it again and again...his mind filling with more questions each time his eyes gazed over the words.

Love & Hate

I hate my toes, I hate my lips;
I love your nose, I love your lips.

I hate my heart that's always tearing;
I love your sweetness, your innocent caring.

I hate my smile, my laugh, my teeth;
I love your hair, your arms, your feet.

I hate my mind for being full of sand;
I love your wit, I love your hands.

I hate my shyness and my doubt;
I love how you have everything  figured out.

I hate my voice, I hate my sighs;
I love your tone, I love your eyes.

I hate being stubborn and constantly sad;
I love your versatility and how you're rarely mad.

I hate my frown, I hate my hair.
I love your mind...but I wish you would care.

I hate my cheeks, I hate my chin,
I hate how I hold everything in.

I love your humor and even your frown,
I love you even when you're down.

Basically I just hate me...
And even though you're perfection and I could say I love thee...
I hate that it seems...we're never meant to be.
...or are we?

[back in Florida]
        "You... I... What?" Chin choked on her words. AJ smiled softly and got up.
        "Chin," He slipped the ring onto her ring finger. "Will you marry me?" Chin stared at her new ring and then looked up at AJ, who was now fidgety. Chin frowned and took his hands in hers.
        "Alex..."
        "Yeah...?" AJ looked at her expectantly.
        "You're asking me to marry you?"
        "Don't make it sound so wrong..." AJ spoke quietly and looked down.
        "It's just... I ... Alex...AH!" Chin threw her arms around AJ and kissed him. "Yes!" she grinned when they pulled away.
        "Yes?" A smile spread across AJ's face, "We're engaged?"
        "Yes, yes, yes," she said between kisses as he embraced her in a warm hug.
        "Damn, woman, you scared me for a sec," he chuckled lightly. Chin hugged him tighter, showering him with kisses. "I love you..." he whispered into her ear. Chin looked up at him and smiled.
        "I love you, too."

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
 [2 months later--November reunion]
        "Waffles ready yet, Jules?" Nick whined.
        "Can someone please pass the juice!" Lance yelled.
        "Are we out of cereal?" Chin asked, searching the pantry.
        "Where did you guys hide the bagels?" Jenny plopped down on Brian's lap, frowning.
        "Move your butt, Carter. I am not your maid..." Julie snapped, glaring at him for using her nickname in public. Everyone was in the kitchen or the family room.
        "Orange or apple?" Cathy looked at the two juice cartons in front of her.
        "I have the last box here," AJ called to Chin.
        "Found the bagels!" Hannah declared from inside a cabinet. She had gotten up to help Jenny.
        "Who else wants a waffle?" Howie asked after giving Nick some to end Julie's death glares.
        "Orange...I guess..." Lance shrugged.
        "Don't you dare finish my frosted Flakes, Alex!" Chin threatened.
        "Thanks!" Jenny jumped to her feet.
        "Me!" Cathy and Hannah both yelled, eyeing the waffles.
        "Ran out of milk!" Nick yelped, noticing AJ looking pitifully at the raised milk container as only drops of the liquid slowly fell onto his awaiting Frosted Flakes.
        "Garage!" both Sarah and Kevin yelled from their cereals, then turned to each other and laughed. Nick smiled innocently at his girlfriend. Julie gave a huff, rolled her eyes, and headed to get the milk. AJ, giving up on his cereal for the moment, sat silently stirring his coffee, watching Chin read a magazine and eat cereal. Brian, sitting on his left, nudged the tattooed man.
        "Who knew you would be the first?" Brian chuckled quietly.
        "Yeah..." AJ smiled, his eyes still on Chin as she ate her breakfast. After returning from their trip, everyone had been told the news. Jenny and Hannah had practically killed Chin in a hug when they returned home for the reunion. AJ and Chin had been engaged for sometime now, but because of the reunion, it still felt like fresh news;  everyone was there to celebrate it, and they had been doing so, for about a week.
        "Stop that. You're going to make me gag." Brian noted AJ's soft gaze pretended to choke and collapsed on the floor.
        "Brian! You okay?" Jenny rushed over. AJ laughed and leaned down.
        "Look who's talking, Rok..." AJ smirked. Brian just smiled back as Jenny left a kiss on his forehead and helped him up.
        "Ack!" Cathy yelped. She had spilled some juice.
        "Here..." Howie rushed over with a rag. He wiped up the mess for her. When he got up, Cathy slyly attacked him with a hug and kissed him.
        "I love you..." she whispered.
        "Too much lovey dovey stuff in the morning!" Kevin yelled. Everyone else just shrugged and grinned in reply. He glanced at Sarah but she was nursing her mug of Ovaltine, staring intently at the back of Chin's magazine.
        "Cup!" Nick demanded.
        "Who you asking to get it?" Julie returned with the milk. She put it on the counter and placed her hands on her hips.
        "Nick, how long have you been in this house?" Hannah raised an eyebrow.
        "You still don't know where the cups are?" Cathy accused.
        "Here!" Howie chucked a cup at the blond boy.
        "Thanks, bro..." Nick smiled sheepishly at the girls then turned to pour himself some milk.
        "Hannah, are you going to finish your waffle?" Lance asked, poking at it with his fork.
        "Touch that and die..." she threatened, plopping down in her chair with a napkin.
        "Hey, who took the milk?"
        "Aww, who finished the cereal?"
        "The milk is on the counter."
        "We’ll buy more cereal later today."
        "Are all the bagels out?"
        "Jules, can you get me a fork?"
        "I put them back in the cabinet."
        "Nick, do you want to be slapped?"
        "Where'd the juice go?"
        "What? Don't look at me."
        "Cathy, you had it last."
        "Will you move in with me?"
        "There's apple juice by Nick," Cathy pointed out.
        "Ok, can someone pass it to me?" Hannah asked.
        "Sure, Hannah. Nick, can you pass the apple ju--" Sarah paused. What Nick had said had just registered in her head.
        "WHAT?" everyone yelled and turned to Nick, their minds coming to the same realization. His eyes were on Julie.
        "Wha...What?" Julie asked slowly.
        "Will you move in with me?" Nick repeated.
        "What, to Florida?" Jenny asked.
        "All the way to Florida??" Cathy squeaked.
        "You want Julie to go to Florida?!" Hannah yelped.
        "You want Julie to move to Florida?" Sarah pouted. Nick chuckled.
        "Whatever Julie wants to do," he replied.
        "That's so sweet..." Chin cooed. Julie smiled.
        "Julie, are you leaving us for Florida?" Cathy demanded. "We're gonna lose Chin, now you!?"
        "Who said Alex and I will live in Florida?" Chin exclaimed.
        "How's about none of you go to Florida?" Hannah offered.
        "I...I... I don't know... " Julie slowly  got up.
        "But...but... but... don't leave." Hannah whined.
        "They could go to LA, by the company... that could be nice and close..." Jenny reasoned.
        "Don't get us started on you and problems with distances!" Sarah squinted at Jenny.
        "Time to escape..." Julie pulled Nick out of the room.
        "Where's the cereal?" AJ piped up. "I'm hungry for some more."
        "What?" Jenny and Chin turned to AJ.
        "Hey, I'm not like Nick. At least I found a bowl..." AJ grinned.
        "You already had one, genius. What are we going to do with you?" Chin groaned.
        "What are you going to do with him," Brian corrected Chin.
        "Yea... He's yours for good now..." Jenny snickered.
        "Oh, bite me."
        "With pleasure..." AJ snickered.
        "AH! Get away from me, Alex!" Chin ran and hid behind Sarah, who had gotten up to wash her things. With shock, she promptly dropped them, causing another round of chaos in the kitchen.

[in Julie's room]
        "You...But...Florida?...I..." Julie plopped down on her bed and placed her head in her hands.
        "I wasn't asking to give you a headache, Jules," Nick said gently. He sat down beside her quietly.
        "You're not, Nickers," Julie said softly smiled and looked at him, forgetting any previous annoyance she had had with him, names, orders, and all. "But Florida?"
        "The girls put words in my mouth. We could always get some place close by," Nick suggested. "Like what Jenny said; in LA. Or even down the street, kinda like Kev. We don't have to go to Florida...although my mom wants us to..." Julie thought for a moment.
        "So are you asking me to move in with you... or is your mom?"  she grinned.
        "No! I am," Nick looked down. "I just... Well... if you don't want to..."
        "No, I never said that." Julie took Nick's hands in hers.
        "Sorry for being such an ass in the kitchen. I was nervous," he apologized.
        "It's ok. Just don't make that a habit," Julie smiled.
        Silence settled for awhile.
        "So..." Nick looked up.
        "So... let's move in together," Julie smiled softly.
        "Do you want to?" Nick asked. "I mean... we could live anywhere you wanted to...we can go anywhere... But I'm not forcing you..." Julie crawled toward Nick.
        "If you want...I'll live in Florida with you, or we can go to LA; I'll be fine with changing newspapers...but not until after Chin and AJ's wedding. Can we just get something nearby for now, like Kevin did?"
        "So you're sure about this?" Nick raised his eyebrows.
        "Yes...Are you?"
        Nick nodded and wrapped his arms around Julie, pulling her into his lap. "So it's settled...we'll find a place around here...and move in together." He couldn’t stop smiling. And neither could she.

>>Chapter Eleven...part one